One thing I have struggled with with PTSD is losing my appetite. In fact, I went two whole weeks without eating anything about a few years ago. I hid it from my family and friends and when I tried to eat again, everything I swallowed hurt my chest so bad. It took another two weeks to heal.
I know that I don’t want to go through that again, however when panic attacks happen, the first thing that goes is my appetite. When I finally admitted that I had a serious problem, I talked with hubby and confessed it to him. To my surprise, he wasn’t angry with me, just concerned.
He made me promise him that I would eat something, no matter how much. These days, I’ve been fasting a couple of meals because I’m in prayer (deep prayer) for my total healing. So, I break my fast at 3 PM and eat. I can only handle small portions like a ham/cheese slider and small salad or a bowl of cereal. Again, it doesn’t matter the proportions…as long as I eat and keep my promise to hubby.
I’ve since confided in other lady friends of mine and found that 90% of them have suffered the same thing as me and while that saddens me, it also encourages me that I’m not alone. The one thing I can’t do is let the depression overtake me to the point that I can’t function. I still feel God wants more from me and I know my hubby has goals that include me so I have to keep fighting.