Years ago, my M.O. was very simple. If a life situation became too difficult, I would retreat. If a person got too close to me, I would draw back. If crisis came knocking, I’d shut down. It was my coping mechanism to deal with trauma, sudden surprises, and disappointments. But God wants me to come up higher. He doesn’t want me to keep hiding and running when He’s around. My spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. (Matthew 26:41).
And you know the funny part is…I knew I was not reacting as I should have. I know God is more powerful than any problem I face. Yet, I don’t act like it. I have to be real. There is a BIG difference between saying “God is able” and “God will do that for me.” I have to take the scriptures to be more specific to my life and not just some abstract phrase we all say.
It’s all too easy to sink back into old habits when new troubles arise. Case in point: we got some bad news the other day of monies we were led to believe was ours and it was monies we live on to pay rent and other bills; we’re talking thousands of dollars not coming this winter. Well, we never received a letter stating we were not eligible to receive the check and if this news had come a year or so ago, my reaction would have been much different. I would have fallen into deep depression and stopped talking for days and weeks.
Instead, I felt anger and hurt for roughly about a minute, and I mean that, and then I felt a peace come all over me. It was as if God was saying, “I GOT THIS!” The paperwork was submitted back in October, so there should not have been any reason why the company could have mailed us a letter stating we were not eligible. But, that goes to show you where our customer service is these days, but that’s a topic for another day…
I prayed over this situation and then went on with my day. The Lord blessed me with yarn that day given to me by dear friend! God allows trials to strengthen us, BUT He also allows them to show off too! He wants us to know how powerful He really is. He wants us to know that there are no ends with Him, He is not governed by the world’s economy, the doctor’s report, the wayward child’s behavior, tied up paperwork, even prison cells can’t stop Him from performing His will and bringing good out of bad. He wants us to try Him and see that He does not just sit in Heaven doing nothing. He is constantly working on our behalf.
“Be still and KNOW that I am God.” – Psalm 46:10
I’m preaching to myself, because I know before the blessing comes the trial. The enemy would want me to fail this test but I don’t plan to. If I have to repeat the scripture, (paraphrasing Deuteronomy 15:6 and 28:12, “I will lend to many nations and borrow from none”) for weeks until God moves, I will!
I know The Lord has something big to show us and He knows we don’t want to go into debt again and He knows we’re tithers and givers. You can’t out give God! He is going to show up and show out! And I’m going to take a front row seat!